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Ethiopia, you were awesome.
Priest, Lalibela
Good
Children Do I want a shoe shine? No. Do I want burnt popcorn/peanuts/seeds [delete as appropriate]? No. Do I want to play grandmothers’ footsteps where 20 children aged 2-8 follow us down the street, tap us on the back, then run away as fast as their little legs will carry them in fits of giggles? Well, ok, not sure I have much choice in that one. Do I want same children to return and sing us a song? Yes. Repeat again and again and again…
Bad
Electricity/Water Supply Miraculous that I haven’t been lathered up in the shower and all power goes. All Africa suffers from power cuts, but here it is daily. Often the two sides of a town take it in turns to have power – matches and candles always required. Many hotels use an electric pump to get water to rooms, thereby increasing the likelihood of lather but no rinsing scenario. A plus point though, am now a dab hand at effectively flushing the toilet with a bucket of water.
Ugly
Bugs: Most evil yet encountered. Flies desperate for salt won’t leave you alone and mosquitoes that don’t know when to give up.
What lies beneath?
UNESCO World Heritage site
Home to 120 stelae with mysterious underground tombs and a monk in a cave guarding the Ark of the Covenant.
Indiana Jones would love this place. Axum is a small town covered with stelae (obelisks), beneath which are burial tombs. Astonishingly, 98% of these are yet to be excavated, maxing mummy/treasure finding opportunity. You can be literally walking around in the fields and step on a hollow-sounding bit. Brilliant.
Best moment: approaching a little old man guarding a shed and finding inside the Ethiopian Rosetta Stone. Dating to around 350BC, the pillar is inscribed with Sabaean, Geéz and Greek.Three farmers found it when ploughing a field. The inscription apparently contains a curse of the ilk ‘move it and you’re dead buddy’. Needless to say it remains exactly where it was found.
Not so good: our guide’s fantastical stories. E.g. he claimed one underground tomb was the Queen of Sheba’s sauna. Riiigghht.
Sadly we didn’t see the Ark of the Covenant or we’d have burst into flames. Now what would Indi have done….
Gin
We’re in Bahir Dar (North Ethiopia) and next to it’s famous 250sqkm Lake Tana. Our experience thus far:
Lonely Planet (LP) ‘Lake Tana’s beauty is obvious; it’s blue waters lapping on lush shores…’
Us ‘It’s a brown stagnant pond’
LP ‘There are some mosquitoes here’
E ‘I’m wearing a shroud, dipped in deet, and have over 40 bites today thank you’
LP ‘The Summerland Hotel comes highly recommended’
Us ‘Staff are depressed, but muster enough energy to be rude’. Hotel changed.
LP ‘Lounging lakeside watching pelicans skim the water might be the most relaxing way to pass the time’.
Us ‘Ok, you’re having a laugh now’. Bird count: zero.
Final verdicts.
LP ‘Gorgeous’
N ‘Underwhelmed’
E ‘Scratchy’
Next step, at 30p each, double gins all round. Only drinking tonic for the quinine.
Pop. 8484 Elev. 2630m Other. 11 churches built by angels.
Bet Giyorgis Church
One of the greatest religious-historical sites in the Christian world, Lalibela has 11 awesome churches each carved from a single piece of rock. UNESCO loved it and so did we.
King Lalibela, on an enforced tour of Jerusalem in the 12th Century (brother wanted his head), was inspired to build a new holy city for Africa. The churches were born on his return home with a little divine help.
Each church has a unique cross and a splendid priest.
As Addis is so large, we’ve used the occasional taxi and had some tough negotations about fares. There’s rip off and there’s double London prices (too many UN expense accounts I think).
On day 3 we meet our first tame taxi driver, Yared, and he’s a bit of a geezer. Like other young middle class Ethiopians, he’s obsessed by Western culture – a hip hop lover and dressed head to toe in the ‘right’ gear. His taxi even has a $300 stereo system that announces our arrival as we scream around.
We like Yared a lot, he’s bright, funny, and obviously the man about town. Sadly, he wants to bury all Ethiopian culture in the past, and explains that this feeling is common (he says universal) among his generation.
N. ‘Yared, how would you describe Addis?’
Y. ‘Full of chicks and freaks (Rastas, see below) man. Full of chicks and freaks.
Fact of the Day: Rastafarianism, wassitallabout? A religious sect which holds that past Ethiopian King Haile Selassie was divine and a savior, that Ethiopia is Eden, and that it should return to a monarchy.
We met your namesake today.
At 3.2 million years old, Lucy is a hominid standing proud on two legs. She’s a dab hand with tools and a cutie (a pocket-sized 1.1m tall).
Size: 250sqkm Pop: 4 million Elev: 2,400m
Addis Ababa, THE place to be in Africa.
A huge sprawling cosmopolitan city, HQ for the UN Economic Commision for the continent and business hub. Blue/white taxis and shiny UN 4x4s jostle for space on wide tarmac roads with the occasional donkey train. Wattle and daub huts and luxury 5* hotels sit side by side. Everyone it seems is glued to their mobile. Climate is a pleasant 18 degrees C and it’s very green.
Not what you expected eh?
We gotta get out of this place... 